Because your car isn’t saying that “shit is weak” it’s actually letting everyone know you suffer from unsatisfactory bowel movements.
I suggest prunes. Maybe some fiber gummies.
This feature was originally an assignment for a major publication. At the eleventh hour, they pulled the plug on the piece. They were nice enough to still pay the entire freelance fee. I’m explaining all this because the piece doesn’t really fit the usual voice of this blog, but I thought people might enjoy it. So…enjoy it.